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The Division Between Work and Home Time

Agreeing on a division of work and home time can be a difficult task.

Both Tom and Sally have to be as honest and open as possible about their needs, wants, and fears.

For example, Tom may fear that if he isn't working all the time, he will lose his job. Or, he may simply fear being branded an also-ran at work. Sally has to understand Tom's feelings and help him see whether they are justified, and how they can be balanced with Sally's and the family's needs.

Sally may feel that if she and Tom don't have enough time alone, then their marriage will dry up.

Tom needs to understand that Sally has a valid point. A marriage is more than just a partnership with each contributing agreed-on amounts of money, home making, and childcare. And to make it be more than that, the two of them must find time for each other on a regular basis. And they have to work out and agreement on the amount and quality of this together-time.

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Last Update February 1, 2008
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